Your Natural Way

Listening to your heart...and french toast!

2008-07-28T09:54:00.003Z

Received from the 'Notes from the Universe' today:

"The only way to get what you really want, is to know what you really want.

And the only way to know what you really want, is to know yourself.

And the only way to know yourself, is to be yourself.

And the only way to be yourself, Donna, is to listen to your heart.

I do,
The Universe

Thoughts become things... choose the good ones! ®
© www.tut.com ®

French toast every now and then might help, too, Donna. "

What's your heart telling you about your business today?

Love

Donna.x

You Simply Must Practice

2008-07-15T09:52:00.001Z

In the final module of the latest class, one of our participants came up with this GEM of a quote:

“You simply must practice, there’s no better way” Said Christopher Robin to Winnie the Pooh.

Couldn’t have said it better myself!

Love

Donna.x

"Being in Service of"

2008-07-11T15:20:00.003Z

I am reading The Soul of Money by Lynne Twist. She has a vast experience and deep understanding of people and money through direct and intimate experiences over four decades of fund-raising and work in four major global initiatives: to end world hunger; to protect the rain forest; to improve health, economic, and political conditions for women; and to advance the scientific understanding of human consciousness.

In her first 45 pages, Lynne talks about the deep, soul-felt reasons that she does what she does. Those reasons seem to impel her forward in her life and career. She feels deeply committed.

Here are some of her phrases that may stimulate a sense of recognition in you and trigger a desire for a further look at your 'being in service of' statement. I will rephrase them into statements.

I am here to help myself and others discover startling truths about our human nature and human potential.
I open my heart with deep commitment to compassion and love for all.
I am a shining and visible example of the power of commitment to............
I am in service of the principles of personal transformation and empowering self-inquiry.
I am becoming a powerful instrument of what's wanted and needed for the affirmation of human life.
I help people to reconnect with their own higher calling, or soulful longing, to be the kind of people they want to be.
I provide a safe place and opportunity for people to discover and engage in their greatness.

In the beginning of her career, Lynne probably couldn't have verbalized these inner urges/feelings as well as she does now. She may have changed the words as she allowed the feelings to come up and be observed. She does admit to changing many of her beliefs as time passed and this book is really about changing our core beliefs about money and the impact that it has on the world's social, economic, and political development. Lynne Twist's wide perspective on this and much more is not to be missed!

We are each a unique and valuable piece of this puzzle we call the World. Without each and every one of us, the world would be incomplete, a lesser place.

Love,

Barbara

International Happiness Day - July 10!

2008-07-07T22:31:00.003Z

More info at: http://www.InternationalHappinessDay.com

I thought you all would like to know about the first International Happiness Day. Their tag line is “ Happiness is an inside job”, which I love.

The goal: Get 1,000,000 people or more to choose to experience deep inner happiness starting on July 10th. 194 countries will be participating!

There is great power in joining with the energy of others to make a difference. This should raise our vibration and that of the Earth substantially.

See you, feel you, on July 10 as we make a commitment together to be happy!
This is a ‘no-brainer’ for me!

Love,

Barbara

You Do Not Have To Be Good

2008-06-27T15:00:00.002Z

Wild Geese by Mary Oliver

You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
for a hundred miles through the desert repenting. 
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves. 
Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine. 
Meanwhile the world goes on. 
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain 
are moving across the landscapes,  
over the prairies and the deep trees, 
the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air, 
are heading home again. 
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,  
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting —
over and over announcing your place  
in the family of things.

from: Mary Oliver, New and Selected Poems, Volume One

This is your natural way, and mine.

Love,

Barbara

To say Yes to this, say No to that

2008-06-25T15:09:00.002Z

As you are finding Your Natural Way, you will find philosophies that 'fit' your way of being and others that frankly, do not! I was chatting to a client today about 'motivational' e-mails and how they always make him feel bad! My personal style is inspiration, not motivation - if you have to push me to complete something, why am I doing it at all?

Anyway, if it's not Your Natural Way, if it's not feeling good, if it's not feeling easy...bin it! Why keep reading things that make you feel bad? Remember that Your Natural Way is absolutely valid for YOU. Not everyone in the world will agree, and nor do they need to! And the more you cull the things that DON'T work for you, the more space you will have for things that DO work.

Love

Donna.x

Radical Responsibility

2008-06-22T19:59:00.003Z

Radical responsibility - what does this mean? Sounds kind of scary! Well, it is both liberating and scary, I guess. We know that to be responsible is to pay your bills on time, to pick up the children on time, to walk our talk, to be truthful, to commit and follow up, and more. Here is the dictionary meaning of responsible.
1. answerable or accountable, as for something within one's power, control, or management...

Radical responsibility is accepting that you are 100% answerable and accountable for everything that is happening in your life. That would mean that everything in your life is within your power, control, or management. Further, that would mean that you have chosen and can continue to choose in each moment, how your life expresses through you in the world.

Nothing happens to you. You are not a victim of circumstance. Somewhere, someplace, sometime, you chose that circumstance. No blaming someone or something else allowed. It all comes down to you.

Kind of liberating and scary, eh?

Love,

Barbara

Useful or Useless?

2008-06-17T00:13:00.003Z

I love hardware stores and gadgets. I can spend hours browsing through building stores looking at everything that would make a job easier, from knee pads (mine are purple!) to fruit ripeners to plant moisture measurers. I'm fascinated by what the human mind can conjure up. I just know that someone was in the middle of a job and a light bulb went on as they thought of that tool to make their life easier.

We seem to naturally move toward what is easier for us. I use a tool for making decisions and choices easier. I ask myself, " Is this useful or useless?"

Is it useful or useless to buy the multi-tasking tool that is so cool looking and easy to store but the handle gets in the way when you use the screw driving attachment? Is it useful or useless for me to subscribe to 5 different newsletters on marketing my coaching business? Is it useful or useless to focus on what feels good and move in that direction? Is it useful or useless to buy my dog booties to keep her feet warm when she hates anything touching her feet? (they are soooo cute!)

Give this little tool a try. I find it very useful!

Love,

Barbara

'You' Are What You Are Selling

2008-06-14T15:30:00.005Z

"All the resources you will ever want or need are at your fingertips. All you have to do is identify what you want to do with it , and then practise the feeling-place of what it will feel like when that happens. There is nothing you cannot be or do or have. ... There is nothing holding you back, other than your own contradictory thought. And your emotion tells you you're doing that. Life is supposed to be fun - it is supposed to feel good!...Savour more: fix less. Laugh more; cry less. Anticipate positively more; anticipate negatively less. Nothing is more important than you feel good. Just practise that and watch what happens..."

- Abraham/Hicks March 2003

How many contradictory thoughts have you had about getting clients? Is that nasty word 'should' part of your self-talk?

Take a moment and close your eyes and get the feeling you have when you remember why you are doing what you are doing. Hold that for a moment. What could you do to hold that good feeling longer? What action could you take now that would make you feel good about you and your business? How does that feel in your body compass?

'You' are what you are selling. And when you feel good about yourself and your business, you are very, very attractive to clients. How more natural and easy can it be?

Love, Barbara

Your Natural Self

2008-06-08T23:50:00.002Z

Many of us were brought up to think that being an adult means doing a lot of things we don't want to do. This does not have to be true. We can fulfil our responsibilities and still evolve by being true to ourselves, clearly focusing on what is meaningful and natural to us, and following that path. It's about you being you and being comfortable with that.

Being true to ourselves allows us to have more clarity around our intrinsic gifts and how to use them in the world. We can listen to our bodies for cues as to whether we feel comfortable with what is happening so that we can choose to stay or to make a change. We can notice our feelings about a situation and the people we are with, and decide whether to be there or not, or listen to our intuition about how to change it. We can detach from outcomes and find the gifts in our experiences. Then, we will have a conduit into our own profound wisdom - that which is true for ourselves.

This is not selfish. This is self-centred in the best possible way. This frees us to be all we can be. This allows us to fully contribute those attributes that are uniquely ours. This allows us to listen carefully to others with a reduction of self-talk in the background, because we are listening to only one voice, our own. This is living from the inside out. This is freedom. And this is the place from where we can be truly responsible and do everything we choose to do, in our natural way.

Love,

Barbara

"The question isn't who is going to let me, it's who is going to stop me."

- Ayn Rand author of Atlas Shrugged, The Fountainhead, and more.

2008-06-03T08:54:00.002Z

From Abraham Hicks Daily Quote (sign up at www.abraham-hicks.com)
Everyone doesn’t have to be the same. Most say, “Well, it’s so much easier if we’re all the same.” And we say, it is not easier when you’re all the same; conformity is the thing that thwarts you most. That massive wanting to get you to conform—to all think the same way and want the same things—is what is causing the revolt that is happening within you. You are determined to be freedom-seekers in a Mass Consciousness society that is determined to make you the same.

Excerpted from a workshop in Asheville, NC on Saturday, October 25th, 2003

All Is Well
Abraham Hicks

Be the freedom-seeker in your business. You don't have to be the same as everyone else.

Love

Donna.x

Is it Easy or Not?

2008-06-01T21:13:00.005Z

I thought of Your Natural Way when I read this blog post by Stacy Brice:

Some relationships simply aren't meant to be, for any number of reasons. You'll know one of them when things are hard, all the time, or even most of the time. Great relationships are full of ease. And while that's not to say that great relationships never have rough spots to be worked through, it's because they're fundamentally easy that working through the rough spot is - you got it!- easy (or, at least, easier).

When it's just too hard, and everything you do seems to be a mistake, see the sign for what it is...a chance to make things in your business better... and get off that gerbil wheel you've been running on. Graciously (and quickly) say what's so to your client, ..... part company, and move on without giving it another thought! Better clients for you are waiting to avail themselves of your mad skills and overall fabulousness!

-Virtual Moxie, April 16, 2008

Forcing things through acts of will are a habitual not natural way of being.

What relationships are you struggling in? Would you and your client be better off working with someone else?

What would it feel like to let go of that struggle?

Love,

Barbara

What I know for Sure

2008-05-28T14:48:00.003Z

What do you Know for Sure about your business?

What does the voice of inspiration whisper to you?

Hint: this is not the loud voice in your head that says 'you suck'!

When was the last time you took the time to connect with your inner wisdom?

Because, you know, you have all the answers...it's just a matter of being still enough to hear them.

Love

Donna.x

What's the Point of Meeting People if You Don't Stay In Touch?

2008-05-19T11:21:00.003Z

Let's say you go to one networking event every week, and you meet 20 people at each one.

80 people a month.

Of which, only 2 were ready for your services right now.

What about the other 78? You just write them off?

Or do you keep in touch with them, knowing that you can be of service to them...and when they are ready, the chances are good that they will look to you?

You don't have to bombard them with phone calls or e-mails, you can simply stay in touch with them from a place of service.

If you're not sure how - look at how you like people to stay in touch with you, and how much more likely you are to buy from them months (even years) down the line when they have been in touch and in service of your needs.

Love

Donna.x

Who Would I Be If I Weren't Somebody Else?

2008-05-15T16:15:00.004Z

Stephen Covey says:

"To begin with the end in mind means to start with a clear understanding of your destination. It means to know where you are going, so that you better understand where you are now and so that the steps you take are always in the right direction."

This is not me. Statements like this have always intimidated me. I don't really understand them except on an intellectual level. My destination has never been clear. The view has always seemed a bit obscured. I thought I should know where I'm going and suffered a lot of guilt and self-judgment as a result of the seeming randomness of my life. Imagining myself in different jobs and roles never gave me a lift or a sense of destiny. I felt as if this was a great failing on my part to be so much like a paper floating on a stream. Who would I be if I weren't somebody else?

When I relaxed into my more natural self, I realised that I had been doing what I was meant to do and being who I was supposed to be from an early age. With the 'shoulds' pushed aside, I could see myself more clearly. As I made choices based on my values instead of on what somebody else was doing, I discovered my natural way. Living a value-driven life allows me to make choices from my own context and the somebody I become is truly me - naturally! And the path before me is less of a minefield and more of an easy journey of self-affirmation.

I am somebody and that somebody is ME!

"You are always in a universe of choices. Any moment of your life can go in any direction you choose."

-Luis Alberto Urrea in The Hummingbird's Daughter

Love,

Barbara

The Obligation to be Yourself

2008-05-13T14:57:00.000Z

Eleanor Roosevelt:

Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.

I Don't Want Your Happiness, I Want Your Money

2008-05-09T16:16:00.002Z

How do you react to that subject line? Do you feel a warm fuzzy feeling toward me? Do you think 'yes, of course, let me get my credit card'? Or do you feel a little taken aback, somewhat soiled, even revolted?

Obviously it's fairly rare that someone will say that (or write it) aloud...but if that's their intention, can you feel it anyway? Can you feel when someone just wants to sell to you, whether you want or need their product or service or not? Do you buy from those people?

Have you checked which side you are 'coming from' intentionally lately? Do you want the money, or do you want people to experience what you do and have their lives improve as a result? I am not saying you can't make money by just being after the client's cash - double glazing salesmen do it all the time - but it is much easier to 'get' a client if you are serving them, not your bank account.

Love

Donna.x

Always Serving

2008-05-02T14:35:00.001Z

What are you 'in service of' in the world? What is your driving ideal? What would you love to change about the world?

Did you know you are ALWAYS serving that ideal? Not just with your clients, but with yourself, your family and friends, everyone you interact with.

This doesn't mean you need to become a pulpit basher! But it does suggest that if you are conscious of what you are serving, you will be able to serve consciously and more effectively...always. All Ways.

Love

Donna.x

Easy Gardening

2008-04-30T10:38:00.002Z

If you take a look at nature, grass doesn't 'try' to grow, it just grows. Flowers don't struggle to bloom, they just bloom. The sun doesn't try to force itself up in the middle of the night, it comes up with ease when the time is right for it to do so.

What could you and your business learn from this? What are you 'trying', 'struggling' or 'forcing'? What would you change if you saw it as a natural process? There may still be some action, after all, we need to sow the seed, feed and nurture the plant, and create the right conditions for it to happen.

But there's no trying, struggling or forcing involved.

What is the next natural step for your business?

Love

Donna.x

Being Yourself is a Lifelong Experiment

2008-04-23T19:37:00.003Z

Here at Your Natural Way, we run courses and group coaching programs that run for 4-12 months, but we don't expect that in that time you will stop learning about yourself. After 3 years of Your Natural Way, I am still deepening my learning about MY natural way and finding ever easier and ever more fun ways to be fully myself.

Humans are like onions...layers.

Keep peeling back the layers of the authentic you. For always.

Love

Donna.x

Take what works for you

2008-04-17T09:21:00.002Z

I heard something the other day that seemed to embody the YNW philosophy:

"Whatever you read, hear or see, take what works for you and leave the rest behind."

What resonates with you is likely to be part of your natural way, so take that. What does not resonate is likely to be part of someone else's natural way, let them get on with it and get on with YOUR natural way.

Love

Donna.x

"I slept and dreamt that life was joy..."

2008-04-15T14:30:00.003Z

A big part of the Your Natural Way to Get Clients teleclass is the module "Being in Service of". We start thinking about this in module 4 and, gradually, over the remaining time and modules, we come to some statement about what we are 'in service of' in our life and business. It may be a sentence or two that only we understand. But the great thing is that we do understand what it means to us.

Being in service is not something that I thought about concretely until I took the YNW class. I don't know why - I was kind, generous, and helpful to others but without specific intention. What I do know is that having my 'in service' statement taped on my computer monitor makes a difference to how I set my intention for the day, and to how I interact with others. Somehow in the process of determining what I am being in service of, I started to realize that I can and do make a difference in this world. My life became more meaningful as I defined my intention of being in service and how I will be in service. I feel more focused and resolute, more goal-oriented in a less materialistic way. There is something within me that is satisfied by saying my service statement out loud and having it witnessed by my coach and my classmates. It gives that intention power and I feel more empowered in my life. By giving meaning and purpose to my life and business, I feel happy. When I feel happy, I am more effective and creative, more expansive. Life becomes joy.

"I slept and dreamt that life was joy. I awoke and saw that life was service. I acted and behold, service was joy." - Rabindranath Tagore

Love,

Barbara

The Best Belief

2008-04-09T08:26:00.001Z

Hi guys

Thought I would share with you my favourite tool for changing beliefs:

The thought: Eg I don't know how to get clients
A slightly better thought: Eg I can find out how to get clients
An even bettter thought: Eg I am learning more about getting clients every day
The best thought I can think today: Eg I know in my heart exactly what to do to attract the people who are right for me. be myself - as I am a magnet for those few it is perfect and natural for me to connect with.

Love

Donna.x

Shopping for Beliefs

2008-04-07T16:34:00.003Z

Ok, today we are going shopping. Woo hoo!!! I already bought some red shoes and some jaffa cakes, so now I'm ready for a different sort of shopping.

Belief Shopping.

You need to make a list of what beliefs you need. To do this, imagine that you have the business you really want to have (you know what that looks like, right?). What beliefs do you have in this ideal business? EG the belief that client getting is easy or the belief that you ARE good enough to do this.

Make a shopping list of the beliefs you don't yet have that you need.

Now go shopping!

Love

Donna.x

Nothing Big Required - You Are Enough!

2008-04-04T00:16:00.002Z

"Most of us have the feeling that we are here to accomplish something big in our lives, and if we haven't done something that fits the bill, we may feel as if we are waiting. We may feel incomplete, or empty, as if our lives don't yet make sense to us, because they don't line up with our idea of major accomplishment. In some cases, this may be because we really are meant to do something that we haven't yet done. But, in most cases, we can let ourselves off the hook with the realization that just being here, being ourselves, is enough.

As we live our lives in this world, we share our energy and our spirit with the people around us in numerous ways. Our influence touches their lives and, through them, touches many more people. When we strive to live our lives to the fullest and to become our true (natural) selves, we are doing something big on an inner level, and that is more than enough to make sense of our being here on this planet at this time. There is no need to hold ourselves to an old idea in the back of our minds that we need to make headlines or single-handedly save the world in order to validate our existence.

We can each look within our hearts to discover what is true for us, what gives our lives meaning, and what excites us. We can release ourselves from any pressure to perform that comes from outside of our inner sense of purpose. Staying in tune with our own values and living our lives in tune with our own vision is all we need in order to fulfill our time here...we can trust that this is enough."

From: today@dailyom.com (DailyOM)

What is meaningful to you? Is your natural way enough? Any beliefs in there that may be sabotaging your faith in your way? What do you think?

Love, Barbara

Don't Follow the Herd

2008-03-31T12:42:00.002Z

Doing things Your Natural Way means that you will be striking out on your own sometimes. While 'everyone else' is busy being 'everyone else', you will be doing something different, being you. Being You. Your Way. In your life and in your business.

So don't worry about what the herd are doing - they couldn't be you if they tried so you will be out on your own sometimes. Let them do what they are doing, and be yourself.

Love

Donna.x

100th post!!!

2008-03-27T11:58:00.002Z

Wow - 100 posts! It's a milestone. Thank you for being with us and reading this blog - we couldn't do it without you!

So, as it's post number 100, i thought I would just do a quick reminder about the whole point of Your Natural Way.

Your natural, authentic self is your most compelling self.

And being this natural self will draw business to you. Doing the things that are natural to you will make the whole business of client getting fun and easy.

Experiment with being your natural self in your business and just see what happens.

Love

Donna.x

A quick test to see if it's working

2008-03-25T18:43:00.004Z

1. Does it feel good?
2. Are you getting the results you want?
3. Does it feel good?

3 yes's - it's definitely working
2 yes's - maybe there's something that would make it work better
1 yes - what would make this feel good AS WELL AS getting the results you want.

No yes's - why are you doing it again?

Love

Donna.x

The Quest

2008-03-23T20:30:00.002Z

"The quest for a meaningful life is unending". (This is a quote that I picked up and forgot to acknowledge the author. My apologies!) This is much the same as knowing that the journey of life is what is important, not the conclusion. Though, at the end of my life, I would like to be remembered for my better qualities and deeds :-).

Questing has been an honoured activity for centuries. Looking for the Holy Grail, trolling the seas for hidden treasure, completing tasks that fulfill a dream (as seen in many fairy tales), the Greek myths, finding the treasure buried by the Knights Templar; these are examples of great quests through the ages.

This is what is interesting to me. The 'treasure' that was at the end of the quest transforms as the journey progresses. The quester becomes more self-aware. The outer institutions that seemed to instigate the quest may seem no longer important or seen in a different light. The core of knowing and confidence, the noticing of what worked and what didn't, the building of the questers' natural way of being in the world through the choices they make and the experiences they allow, the determination to be themselves no matter what, the taking of personal responsibility; this is the ever-expanding treasure. This is the beginning, the middle, and the end.

Love, Barbara

"We shall not cease from exploration and at the end of our exploring will be to arrive back at the beginning, and know the place for the first time." - T.S. Eliot

Your Natural Clients

2008-03-19T11:05:00.002Z

So, if you are being fully, completely and wonderfully yourself, who are the people you would love to be working with? Are you working with them right now?

If not, is that because you are not being fully, completely and wonderfully yourself?

Love

Donna.x

Live Full Out, Change the World

2008-03-12T16:42:00.003Z

Are you living full out? Are you 100% your natural, joyful, beautiful self?

Did you know if you live full out, you change the world?

Your perception of your world changes, and other people cannot help but be affected by your authentic energy.

Wow, I can feel your starshine over here!

Love

Donna.x

Our Worst Fear

2008-03-11T18:36:00.004Z

"Our worst fear is not that we are inadequate.

Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our Light, not our darkness that most frightens us.

We ask ourselves, "Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous!"

Actually, who are you, not to be!

You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world.

There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.

We were born to make manifest the Glory of God within us.

It is not just in some of us, it is in everyone, and as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.

As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

- Marianne Williamson (quoted by Nelson Mandala)

How are you hiding your light? What beliefs do you have about standing out in a crowd, about being the best you can be? Are those beliefs true?

Love,

Barbara

Your Ripeness Monitor

2008-03-10T15:20:00.002Z

How do you know if a client is 'ripe'? What factors do you take into account? Or do you try to yank them of the tree before they are ready? Or worse still, leave them on the tree to rot.

Quick, get a piece of paper and jot down 5 things that tell you that someone is ready to work with you or buy your product...go!

Love

Donna.x
PS If you don't 'know', please go to the realm of your imagination...that's what it is for!

Remember that You have Your Answers

2008-03-05T17:43:00.002Z

It is really easy to be pulled off track by 'other people' - you know, those 'other people' who know it all, who've been there, done that, and worn the t-shirt. But is the t-shirt one that you would wear? Is the t-shirt worn in a style that works for you? Or are you going to be out there in costume, feeling inauthentic, and not taking the 'right' action and feeling like a failure?

There's a simple test. Are you doing it in Your Natural Way, or their natural way? I know lots of people who've filled their business through networking, speaking, being very bee-ish and contacting people. It never worked for me! What worked for me was going about my business, working on myself, and writing.

Trust that you know exactly what to do...and then go do it! Learn from my mistakes - i tried everyone else's way first, then came back (after 2 years, I'm a slow learner!) and did what I knew to do in the first place!

Love

Donna.x

Check your Intention

2008-03-03T20:47:00.002Z

What is your intention for your business? What is your intention for this week? This month? This year? Is that intention consistent? Or do you start the month intending to attract 10 clients, and end the month intending 1? What happens to your intention as time goes by? Does it remain crystal clear or does it get cloudy?

Check your intentions regularly. By the way, your results will tell you if your intention is crystal clear or not. Remember, no judgement, no blame - it's just data!

Love

Donna.x

A Transformative Leap

2008-02-29T16:41:00.001Z

2008 is a Leap Year.
Why not make a Transformative Leap this year?
Leap from ‘learning’ about yourself into ‘discovering’ yourself.

How many times have you learned the same lesson over and over again?
The learning curve, the plodding, the baggage attached.

Shift your focus into discovery:
The adventure, the anticipation, the self-awareness.

Which feels lighter?
Learning or discovering?

Practice by changing the word ‘learn’ to ‘discover’ in all your conversations, writing, and thinking. This small step will lead to a great leap into the joy of discovery and the joy of living your life authentically, your natural way.

Love

Barbara

Strong Foundations

2008-02-27T17:17:00.004Z

Excitement! We had an earthquake in the UK last night - hats off to those of you who live in areas of high earthquake activity - earthquakes FREAK ME OUT!

Anyway, it's got me thinking today about strong foundations. And the foundation of Your Natural Way is that you are unique. There is only one of you in all of time. Are you being yourself? Do you know who you are? Who are you?

When you're being fully authentically you, you know it! It feels wonderful. (oh, and it's great for your business too!)

Love

Donna.x

Your Natural Way and the Comfort Zone

2008-02-25T15:45:00.001Z

"A goal or a dream that doesn't challenge the dreamer to become more than they've ever been, to go where they've never gone, or to feel things they've never felt, is actually like wishing for a giant "life snooze button." TUT

Your natural way is not all about staying in your comfort zone. While we want life and business to be easy, and we want to follow the downstream flow of our life, there are those periods of our life where we feel restless, as if we are dissatisfied with someone, something, or everything. By noticing how we are feeling, we can use these feelings as a fertile ground to move forward, to alert us that we are ready to choose the next thing that will not only make us feel good, but may challenge us as we evolve. If cruising feels good, then that is where we can rest for a while. When dissatisfaction and restlessness appear, don’t blame your partner or the weather; take it for the message it is, a ‘heads up’ to reach within to your mind and heart for the next step on your adventure called life.

Love

Barbara

Mysterious Beginnings

2008-02-20T13:06:00.000Z

Taken from the DailyOm

"As any gardener knows, the bulbs that contain the beautiful flowers of spring and summer—daffodils, irises, tulips, gladiolas—cannot bloom until they have endured a period of cold. Held in the dark earth during the frigid winter months, they undergo internal adjustments and changes invisible to our eyes. Like babies gestating in the lightless, watery wombs of their mothers, they are fully engaged in the process of preparing to be born. So many of the greatest mysteries of life begin this way, with a powerful urge for growth enclosed in a small, dark space.

We humans have a tendency to yearn for the light, for the coming of spring, and for the more visible phase of growth that all things express in coming to be. In our love for what we can see with our eyes we sometimes lose patience for, and interest in, the world of darkness that nurtures and protects the seeds, bulbs, and babies of the world for such an important part of their life cycles. It is a perilous and mysterious phase of growth, and one that we have little control over, and perhaps that is why we don’t celebrate it with quite the same passion as we do the lighter and brighter phases of life. Nevertheless, we ourselves endure similar periods of developing in the darkness throughout our lives.

Meditating on the image of a bulb, a seed, or an embryo, can bring us into alignment with the side of our own natures that is like the earth in winter—seemingly asleep but busily attending to details of growth that create the pattern for the children, flowers, and creative expressions to come. Touching down on this place in ourselves, we may feel at once peaceful and activated, utterly still and yet fully creative, quietly in tune with the dark and mysterious beginnings of life.
What do you think?"

How does this relate to your business? What are you missing while you are looking for the spring of your business to come?

Love

Donna.x

It Happens for a Reason

2008-02-18T17:23:00.003Z

Ever had a situation where things didn't go as you planned? Perhaps a seed who doesn't become a client? A course that didn't go ahead? A business venture that went bad ways?

One of the key concepts in Your Natural Way is unattachment - detach from your story about how things 'should' be and what 'should' happen and notice what HAS happened. What is happening? Why is this a good thing? Why might this be the best thing for you?

Sometimes what we think will be the best thing, won't. Imagine for a minute that this is a friendly universe, and this has happened for a good reason. What is good?

Love

Donna.x

Question Everything

2008-02-13T17:57:00.000Z

Once you've decided that something is absolutely true (or untrue!), you've closed your mind on it. A closed mind has nowhere to go.

Question Everything.

Is it really true that you can't get the clients you want?

Is it really true that you 'have to' do certain things to get clients?

Is it really true that there are obstacles in your way?Is it really true that marketing is difficult?

What if it wasn't?

What if questioning that 'truth' revealed a greater truth?

That you can do it, that it can be easy, that you can do what you love and get clients.

The 'truth'? Most of your obstacles are put in your way by you!

Love

Donna.x

I'm OK and You're OK

2008-02-11T15:23:00.000Z

I remember in the 60’s or 70’s, during the time of the love/peace movement, a book called I’m OK, You’re OK. I didn’t read it as I was young and knew everything already anyway. But the title stuck with me and over the years, in conjunction with what I was exploring at the time, it would occasionally pop up into my consciousness.

I now think that this is a Truth and certainly, a Truth at Your Natural Way. I am OK and you are OK and everyone is OK in his or her uniqueness and difference.

When I accept this – that I’m OK just as I am in my natural way of being – it allows me to accept the uniqueness and differences in others and to give up comparing and competing in ways that get me nowhere.

It allows me to look at others as individuals with strengths and weaknesses that are as unique to them as mine are to me. It allows me to be open and aware of how my life may be enhanced by a partnership in business, or invention, or life with that other person whose talents complement mine. I could choose to feel ‘less than’, or that I have to ‘prove myself to’, but in knowing that I’m OK just as I am, my choices are different - more open and accepting to what is possible with others.

Such acceptance could stop wars.

Love

Barbara

How May I Serve?

2008-02-06T17:22:00.001Z

I bang on about service quite a lot. Why? Because it is SO important.

I have been staring blankly at a word document today containing a resource for clients that I am creating – it will be an ebook to sell. My mind was like a sieve. No useful information sticking around long enough to use. Until I heard from a client that this information could really help. Suddenly I have all the motivation in the world. Service.

Next time you’re stuck for motivation, ask yourself this ‘how may I serve?’

Love

Donna.x

Stop Trying So Hard

2008-02-04T13:54:00.000Z

I've noticed that when I start 'trying hard', I am not in My Natural Way. You see, Your Natural Way has an ease, a flow to it - it doesn't involve 'trying' (unless the meaning is 'experimenting' or 'trying something out'). Noticing that you are 'trying hard' is a great red flag to show you that you are making life more difficult than it needs to be.

I know that you need clients, you need them now, and 'trying hard' is the default way to do it. But is it working? Chances are the answer is 'no' or 'not too well'.

So where can you stop trying so hard and find the ease and flow of Your Natural Way?

Love

Donna.x

100% Growth Guaranteed

2008-01-31T18:36:00.000Z

Would you like to see your business grow by 100% over the next 6 months? Would you like to learn a proven strategy for doubling your business that you can use again and again? Join us at Your Natural Way for a small group experience that will help you to understand the process YOU use to get clients, smooth this process out for you and make client getting easier and more FUN!

Led by Donna Higton: Donna was Your Natural Way’s first hand-picked leader in 2005. She has been coaching since 2002, and credits Your Natural Way with saving her business. Now, she is passionate about helping others find their natural way and have a business full of clients, ease and joy.
Read more about Donna here

Course begins 18th February at 2pm GMT / 3pm CET / 9am EST
2 one-hour virtual learning calls per month for 6 months, with full follow up and support material. Read more about the course here.

Contact nicola@yournaturalway.com for more information, to set up a conversation with Donna and for bookings

Payment plans available

The Rules of Getting Clients

2008-01-28T19:30:00.000Z

What rules have you made up about how you get clients?

Eg they cannot be friends, or they cannot pay full price, or they cannot be someone I meet and instantly become a client or they cannot be someone I meet, keep in touch with and become a client after 2 years of knowing me.

Where might your rules be getting in the way of you getting clients?

One of my rules was that clients had to jump through a number of hoops before they could become clients...which made becoming a client a long-winded process for someone who just wanted to be a client, now, with no preamble, no relationship building, no sales pitch, no free sessions, no ... and the list goes on!

Now I have a rule that clients can become clients as fast (or as slow) as they like...and that rule works a lot better!

Love

Donna.x

Serving Me, Serving You, Aha!

2008-01-21T16:29:00.000Z

When I am serving me, I am totally in acquisition mode. I just want your business, I don't care about your problems. It is win or lose, no middle ground.

The irony is that when I am serving you, interested in your problems (and wanting to solve them), I am more likely to get the business. And even if I don't, I get to help you in some way. Win/win.

Who are you serving? Yourself or your clients?

Love

Donna.x

If You Knew What to Do

2008-01-18T12:47:00.000Z

Just a quickie today.

If you knew what to do to get more clients, what would you be doing that you're not doing right now?

Remember to trust your wisdom. You do know what to do.

Love

Donna.x

A Successful Equation

2008-01-16T15:22:00.000Z

Your skills and gifts + someone who wants those skills and gifts and is willing to pay you for them = a great client relationship.

So are you looking for the people who want what you have to offer?

Love

Donna.x

Learning What Works

2008-01-11T10:56:00.000Z

Remember that it takes time to learn what works, just like it takes time to walk, to talk, what doesn't work!

Give yourself the gift of the time to learn.

Love

Donna.x

Doing What Works

2008-01-08T17:37:00.001Z

Whenever I have a lull in my business, I notice that for some reason, I have stopped doing the things that I know work! I've talked a bit on this blog about noticing what worked, and the follow up piece of advice is:

DO IT.

Love

Donna.x

Play 'Bees And Flowers' at Your Christmas Party

2007-12-20T15:07:00.000Z

A 'Bee' is someone who will happily buzz round the room, meeting all the people in a very forward manner. A 'flower' will do it if they have to, but would much rather people came to them.

It's Christmas party season, and a great time to experiment with this - after all, there's no pressure to get clients at a party! Play at being a bee, and play at being a flower. Notice what works, notice how you feel, notice if you have to fortify yourself with red wine to move or stand still! Keep playing, and remember to be yourself.

You never know, you might 'accidentally' get clients!

Love

Donna.x

No 'Right' Way for Everyone

2007-12-19T17:04:00.000Z

There is no 'Right Way' for everyone. There is your way, my way, and all the ways in between. So all those books that say 'this is how you do it'? They mean 'this is how I do it', and you can customise it for you. Or ignore it if it's not your way.

Easy.

Love

Donna.x

Everyone I Meet Must Become a Client

2007-12-12T17:06:00.000Z

As you are out and about in the world, you will meet people who 'could' become clients...people who you connect with, you like, you see that your service can help, and you would love to work with. Would it be ok with you if this perfect client DIDN'T become a client? Would it be ok with you if not everyone you met became a client? Because not everyone will...and that's ok. Some people will be connectors, connecting you to other people who may become clients, some will become friends, some will become clients, some will fizzle to nothing...for now.

And that's ok. Don't let the weight of your expectation for 'a perfect client' or 'anyone' to work with you squash the relationship before it has a chance to serve you! Imagine how that feels from the other side - you meet this great person, have a wonderful connection and then you sense that they are disappointed in you because you are not ready to work with them today. What chance is there of you working with them tomorrow? None.

Let each new connection delight you with whatever it brings you - whether that's a new client now, or 20 new clients way down the line, or...a thousand other possibilities these people may bring you.

Love

Donna.x

Sneaky Beliefs

2007-12-05T17:17:00.000Z

Limiting beliefs that stop you from getting clients can sneak in when your back is turned.

Answer this question to flush out any that are lurking in the shadows: Can you get 20 new clients paying your highest fee by Christmas this year? (If the answer is YES of course I can, double it til some beliefs fall out of the tree!)

If the answer's no, what are the 'reasons' (or limiting beliefs, some call them)? Are these beliefs stopping you from getting the clients you want and deserve?

Love

Donna.x

Don't it Make You Feel Good?

2007-12-03T17:21:00.001Z

One of the key concepts of Your Natural Way is doing things that suit you. Your personality, your preferences, YOUR Natural Way. A very simple test of what this might be is what feels good when you are doing it?

For example, even though I love chatting to people, I hate networking events! They don't feel good (and I experimented with this long enough to know it's not about it being something new). On the other hand, I love going to classes and events that interest me...not to 'network', but to learn something, see someone, have fun. And as an afterthought, an added bonus, I get to chat to people - or network - in a way that feels good.

So, what are you feeling good about and how can you use this to find out more about Your Natural Way?

Love

Donna.x

Who are you with when you're not yourself?

2007-11-27T18:29:00.001Z

There are times when we are 'not' our fully magnificent and shiny selves...maybe when we're ill, stressed, tired...or with people we are not our 'real' self with. We suppress little bits of ourselves with all sorts of different people, until we forget who we are. It's a gradual process, it takes years to suppress the enthusiasm for 'me-ness' that we had when we were 3.

Luckily, it doesn't take as long to release that pent up 'me-ness'...and you can do it gradually. Find someone you are not quite yourself with, and make an effort today to be more 'you' with them. Just a bit more. And then next time, a little bit more, until you are fully you with them. Then find someone else to be 'you' with...and so on.

Boy, these people are in for a treat!

Love

Donna.x

Don't give up on your Garden

2007-11-19T16:07:00.001Z

Life sometimes gets in the way - births, deaths, marriages, random things that just take up your time and take your focus away from your garden. But that is no reason to give up on your garden entirely. Once you have created a garden, it is there for good. It may need a bit of weeding every now and again if you've been neglecting it, but it won't take as much time as you expect.

Those seeds are still there, they are hardier than you give them credit for.

Keeeeeeeeeeep dancing...I mean gardening!

Love

Donna.x

Intentionally Focusing

2007-11-14T12:18:00.000Z

What is your intention for your business? Do you intend to have lots of clients, pots of money, oodles of ease, and a ton of fun? Of course you do!

And what do you focus on?

How many wonderful clients you have (even when there is 1), the money you have, the ease with which you do business, and the enjoyment you have?

OR

How many wonderful clients you DON'T have, how skint you are, how hard it is, and how you are driving yourself into exhaustion?

Your experiment for today is to focus more on scenario A than scenario B...and watch your energy, and you business, soar.

Love

Donna.x

The Thread of Flow

2007-09-27T13:56:00.000Z

What is the thread of flow in your client getting system?

That thread could be anything...just a thread that goes through the process, from seed to harvest and beyond.

Mine is humour (lightness). Yours could be connection, love, joy, focus, motivation, inspiration...anything...

That thread holds together your client getting - is it a strong thread?

Love

Donna.x

Focus on the Garden, Not the Harvest

2007-09-26T14:26:00.000Z

Imagine a tomato plant. A healthy, vibrant, growing tomato plant that's just starting to flower. Now imagine that you have 2 tomatoes on that plant that are ready to harvest.

If you just look at the harvest, you might be disappointed. 2? That's not going to feed me for the rest of my life. 2? That's just not enough. 2? I might as well give up growing tomatoes, I'm obviously rubbish at it.

But if you look at the plant, you can see that there are 2 tomatoes to harvest today, another 12 tomatoes to harvest 'soon', and the plant will feed your compost heap so that next year you will have a bumper harvest!

Now look at the whole garden. 20 tomato plants, fruit trees galore, and an acre of vegetables. Enough to sustain you over a long period of time...easily.

Which way do you look at your client garden? From the point of view of the harvest? Or from the point of view of your wonderful garden, that is growing and developing and will feed you...if you take care of it?

Love

Donna.x

In Service of Your Wallet

2007-09-25T13:14:00.000Z

We are all 'in service of' something in the world - we all want to contribute, and those in business are lucky enough to be able to do that through the medium of their businesses. But sometimes, you are just in service of your wallet! You just want the money. (or your financial situation requires that you go after the £'s!)

How do you think this shows up when you are talking to your clients and prospects? In the past, when I've forgotten what I'm really in service of (passion, joy and love) and I've been serving my bank balance, it's meant that I am just interested in 'making the sale', not helping the person. Not connecting with them. Not doing what is right for both of us. Just getting the £.

It didn't feel good. And it didn't work! I either didn't get the business (because they saw me as a money grabbing *&^^%&*) or I got a client I wasn't connected to. In my line of work, that's an uncomfortable place to be! Since I shifted my attention from 'how may I serve my wallet' to 'how may I serve you', client getting has become easier, more fun...and has opened new doors, because now I'm not just trying to sell what I do, I am looking for ways to make a difference.

Are you serving your wallet or the world? How does that affect your business dealings? What would change if you changed your focus?

To your business' health and happiness!

Love

Donna.x
PS what can I do for you? How can I help you? How can Your Natural Way help you? I'd love to hear from you - please e-mail me.

The Land of Small Tweaks

2007-09-24T13:01:00.000Z

Many of us already have a successful formula for our business. Trouble is, we don't realise it. Do you know what is working? There is something...in fact, it could be everything if you look at it from a certain angle. Something that doesn't work gives you feedback...and that feedback is working to help you make your business better.

Most of the time we don't need to throw the baby out with the bathwater, we just need to change the parameters a bit. And again. And again. Tweak, tweak, tweak. When you enter the land of small tweaks, everything gets easier, because you are just pruning your practices - keeping what works, and helping that to grow with little changes.

You know what they are too...you just need to ask yourself the right question. Not 'what am I doing wrong?', but 'what's working? and how could this work even better?'

Love

Donna.x

No Now or No Never

2007-09-21T12:29:00.000Z

When it comes to 'the ask' (will you work with me?), many of us are afraid of a 'no'. I was too, once upon a time. Now though, I see a no as feedback on the ripeness of the seed. See, if you're trying to pick an unripe fruit, you will get a 'no'. But is that a 'no for now' or a 'no never'? Since I've been doing 'the ask', I rarely get a 'dear god, no, get away from me you sleazy saleswoman'.

Well, actually I've never had that! But it'll be a good story if I do. Anyway, I rarely get a 'no, never'...in fact I can only think of 2 'no, nevers' in the last 2 years, and they were both delivered nicely, in a 'thanks for the invite, but it's not for me' kind of way. It isn't that scary when people say no, and you get to serve them by determining what they need from you to progress along to ripeness.

It's time to get past that anxiety about the 'no's and see them for what they really are - part of your ripeness testing kit.

Love

Donna.x

Different Strokes for Different Plants

2007-09-19T15:47:00.000Z

Each 'seed' you plant (prospect) is different - every potential client will need your considered attention. You will be finding your natural way to nurture your seeds and plants, and remember to stay flexible. You may find that some plants need less nurturing than you would naturally give, and some may need more.

Notice when you are in your garden how the attention you are giving is affecting each plant - do some of them need more water? Talking to? Less attention? The more you can learn from your garden every time you visit, the easier this process becomes.

Love

Donna.x

An Active Flower

2007-09-12T12:21:00.000Z

I just wanted to expand on something I said yesterday, which was that flowers are very active. In nature, flowers have a variety of methods they employ to attract pollinators - scent, colour, texture. In the same way, people 'flowers' can use a wide array of methods to attract clients. Personally I use: a website, a blog (or two!), a newsletter, public speaking (yes, it's a flower technique! Think Chelsea Flowere Show), smiling and being friendly at networking events, wearing bright colours...and more.

The key thing to remember is that this is YOUR natural Way. Your natural way to be a flower. You can be hugely active in your attractiveness.

Love

Donna.x

Shy Violet or Venus Flytrap?

2007-09-11T18:25:00.000Z

I had the pleasure of meeting some lovely people from the Assocation for Coaching today, and they got me thinking about flowers... 'Flowers' are people who see a room full of people they don't know and think 'oh dear'! (or in my case, something slightly less polite!) Knowing that you are a flower (as opposed to a 'bee' who is perfectly happy to buzz round meeting new people) is a really useful distinction...because when you know you can plan your strategy to attract your bee/hummingbird/ladybird.

There is a huge variety of flowers in nature - and you will have your own brand of 'flowerishness'. Mine hasn't got a name (of course, I like to be individual!), but she is very colourful and cheery looking, she leans towards sunny people, and she's quite happy to be in a display garden and have lots of people looking at her! (outside the metaphorical, this means I'm friendly, smiley, cheery, I like talking in front of people, I love talking to sunny people and actively encourage them to talk to me.)

What is your flower like? (or your bee for that matter!) Make no mistake, flowers are active attractors...think of the Venus Flytrap...are you laying snares for the unwary ;-), or are you like the shy violet, quietly attracting those people who are perfect for you and not attracting the notice of those you do not wish to see?

Enjoy this metaphor...it is a lot of fun!

Love

Donna.x

Changing Beliefs - some tools

2007-09-07T10:24:00.001Z

Here at Your Natural Way Towers, we are always experimenting with making it easier to 'get' the Your Natural Way concepts. (by the way, experimenting with making it easier is a great way to make your working life better!)

We've been exploring some tools for changing and exploring beliefs - EFT (www.emofree.com) and The Work of Byron Katie (www.thework.com). Penny Waite (http://www.pennywaite.co.uk/) is an incredible energy specialist, and the very best person I have ever found for working with EFT. And Jon Willis (www.just4questions.com) is a wonderful facilitator of The Work.

If you have beliefs you want to change or explore, I highly reccommend you check these methods and people out.

Love

Donna.x

What are you Learning?

2007-09-06T15:11:00.001Z

When we ask the question 'what's working?', often people just look at the end result they want and say 'nothing'...but they are missing a whole wealth of information. Let me give you an example...when I decided to experiment with asking for referrals (with a statistically significant sample instead of 3 people!), I asked about 40 people for a referral and got back ... nada, nothing, not a bean.

As in I got no concrete referrals, I hadn't signed up any clients directly as a result of these conversations. However, there were positives. What was working? Well, I was learning how to ask, and how not to. Who to ask, and who not to. And as I went along, I was ever drilling down into my natural way to ask for referrals, and what would feel good. Initially, it just felt HARD. I could easily have given up at that point, and dismissed it as 'not working' and 'not my Natural Way'.

But the more you do something, the better you get at it. And I noticed 3 things from this experiment - 1. there were over 40 (for the experiment continued) people who knew what and who I was looking for. 2. There were 'offshoots' of these conversations - random people signed up to my newsletter or started reading my blog. And 3. these people would ask how i was doing. Sometimes in front of other people, who would then get interested in helping me.

I know because I am in their mind, if and when they meet the sort of person I am looking for, they will think of me. That experiment worked. And continues to work now as it is still ongoing, and I have spoken to more than 40 people, and am getting ever closer to my 'perfect' referral request!

So when you are next asking yourself what is working...be prepared to look beneath the surface. Be prepared to see which parts of your experiment are working, and feeling good...even if the result isn't here yet. When you ask what is working, think 'what am I learning' - while you are learning, your experiments are working!

Love

Donna.x

A Bumper Harvest

2007-09-05T15:14:00.001Z

Continuing our garden metaphor, today I want you to take a look at the harvest you will reap this September. Ok, you are probably not planting in order to reap in September, unlike the farmer's in this part of the world, but do you even know what your harvest might be?

The seeds you've planted along the way are maturing, ripening and will be ready for harvest at some point...do you know when you will need your pickers to get to work?

Love

Donna.x

Frowning at Your Garden

2007-09-04T14:57:00.000Z

While speaking to the magnificent Damien Churton (YNW founder, leader, and my coach) this morning, I realised something very interesting. I have been standing in my garden with my hands on my hips, frowning about what I haven't done...instead of just grabbing the tools and doing the gardening!

Metaphorically. In actuality, I had a busy week last week - I was only in the office (garden) for a day and a half, and I didn't do a lot of the things I normally do to look after my garden. So this week when I got back to it, I wasted a few hours (seriously...i only wish I were joking!) looking at what I hadn't done and what that would mean.

The garden metaphor made me realise how utterly ridiculous, pointless and downright unhelpful that particular inaction was!

No matter how messy your garden is, it won't change because you are cross with it. It will only change when you pick up a trowel, and a spade, and a fork, and get on with the gardening!

Love

Donna.x

Your Learning Edge

2007-09-03T14:45:00.000Z

"Stay away from the edge". Ever heard that admonition? Maybe as a kid while walking by the cliffs? It's quite natural to want to stay away from a cliff edge - especially if the consequences are a 200 foot fall to a rocky beach! I've noticed that we also stay away from less physically dangerous edges.

Like your learning edge. The edge of your comfort zone if you like. The point at which you are learning most. Playing it safe might feel more comfortable, but you don't learn as much from there. When you are really at your learning edge, you will learn so much more. And it doesn't have to be hard.

Remember, we at Your Natural Way are all about EASE! We don't want you to cut yourself on your learning edge...but we do want you to notice what's happening and have fun at your learning edge. Rollercoaster scary, not life-threatening scary. Exhilarating, not paralysing. Do you know your learning edge well enough to get the adrenaline without the fear?

What could you do to experiment with this?

Love

Donna.x

100% Business Growth

2007-08-29T16:43:00.001Z

Sound good? 100% growth for your business is our guarantee when you join our Your Natural Way to Get Clients small group .

The next group is starting in 2 weeks time with me, Donna (onthebeach) Higton.

I'd love to have you come join us. To find out more, follow the link above, or e-mail me.

Love

Donna.x

I am SO Not Like That

2007-08-23T13:53:00.000Z

We suggest that the qualities you admire in someone else are qualities that you possess – qualities that are part of your natural self. This is true whatever your reaction to it. The 3 main reactions are:
- oh yeah, I can see that
- hmm, maybe or really? Me? Like that? Wow.
- I’m so not like that!

I always admired Joseph’s calm, peaceful, patient demeanor…and even 3 months ago I was denying that I have any calm, peace, patience in me. I am mayhem in a box…or so I thought. One of my daily practices is to decide who I want to be each day. I pick 3 qualities that I would like to embody. To my astonishment, over the past few months – calm, peaceful, relaxed, and even patient have made it into that top 3…regularly.

But I’m not calm, peaceful or patient! Wrong. I am. That was just a side of my personality I hadn’t allowed ‘out’ before. The clue was always there – I admired these qualities in others…but couldn’t see them in me. Now I can I am so proud that the chaotic side of my personality is counterbalanced by this lovely peaceful, calm and patient self. It still feels like ‘it’s not me’…to my rational mind. My soul, however, recognises this part only too well. And always did.

What part of you are you denying? If you were to acknowledge that you are like that, how would that feel?

Love

Donna.x

Maybe They Won't Like Me

2007-08-22T13:28:00.001Z

Unusually today, this is a crossover post between my own blog, and the Your Natural Way blog. This is a central idea to the Your Natural Way philosophy...and to my philosophy that 'Life's a Beach'. Your Authentic, Natural, True self is your best self.

People often worry that if they expose their real self, other people won't like them. And that would be bad. It is a really common misconception, and I'm not entirely sure where it comes from (possibly the skool daze, where anything different had other kids pointing and laughing!).

But here's what I know from working with hundreds of people to be more authentic in life and business:
- authentic people are a heck of a lot more likeable than those who wear a mask
- there is a certain energy around authentic, natural people that other people like
- everyone wants more authenticity, so the more natural you are, the more other people seem to gravitate towards you
- when you are being your most natural, authentic self, you don't really care what other people think.
- If someone doesn't like the 'real' you, it's ok...we're not all compatible with one another. When you are natural, and someone else doesn't like that, you are happy to let them get on with it - knowing that you are being your best self.
- being yourself gives other people permission to do the same around you, and that is the greatest gift you can give.

Don't worry that people might not like the 'real' you - trust me, YOU will like yourself a whole lot more when you stop pretending to be someone else.

Love

Donna.x

The Book of Me

2007-08-20T12:17:00.000Z

Do you keep a 'Book of Me'? A book where you detail who you are - your natural self. All the parts that make up the inventory of you. The benefit of this is that you can look at this at any time and see how 'you' you are being. You will also see that you are enormously complicated and fabulously simple! You are a mass of contradictions. And somehow, these ingredients mix together perfectly to make...

YOU!

Run that inventory today and check that you are using all the ingredients that make up the very best you, and if you're not...start mixing some of the less used ones into the mix.

Now, won't that feel better?

Love

Donna.x

Another Course End...

2007-08-17T13:05:00.000Z

Our teleclass course is a funny thing - it's just 8 modules over 16 weeks, but I still get enormously attached to each group! The final class is just amazing - where we look at the growth people have gone through over the past 4 months.

This week saw the final class of the latest group, and I want to say thank you to the participants of this group, once again, you have all been wonderful and it is a beautiful thing to see you blossoming into that magnificent being that you truly are. As ever, it had me completely choked up, with my heart broken wide open with joy.

And if you want to know what I'm on about, why not come take the YNW to Get Clients course with us?

Much love

Donna.x

My Own Special Creation

2007-08-15T11:20:00.000Z

"I am what I am, I am my own special creation" - Gay anthem for the past 20 years, and in my opinion, one of the most empowering songs ever written. Go Gloria (Gaynor)

"Life ain't worth a dam, til you can shout out I am what I am"

Do you own your magnificence this much? Do you see what a special creation you've made? Do you know just how wonderful you are? It's time to own it, and say "I am what I am".

And that's just great!

Love

Donna.x

Stop Trying to Impress

2007-08-14T11:49:00.000Z

Are you trying to impress someone else? Do you want to 'show' them? How can you possibly be yourself when you are busy trying to impress?

Your Natural Self is THE most impressive you there is. There's no one like you anywhere else on earth. You're it. Unique. Magnificent. You. If you truly live that, you will never need to impress anyone ever again because they will be dazzled by you anyway (or not...but if not, it won't matter because you are yourself!).

Love

Donna.x

Giving Away your Power

2007-08-13T12:09:00.000Z

I had an e-mail last week from Andrea Lee about how we give away our power by blindly following a 'guru'. Remember that there is a 'right' way - a right way for you. And a right way for her. And a right way for him. And a right way for them. All these 'right way's might be similar...but each one will be unique to the person the way is for.

Remember that you are the one who is the expert on you. Other people may know a lot about marketing, business, sales and wealth...but you are the only one who can interpret it for your world. Don't give your power to a 'guru', listen to said 'guru' and make up your own mind. Trust me, you are a lot more powerful than you think.

Love

Donna.x

Permission

2007-08-10T12:00:00.000Z

I hereby give you permission to be yourself.

Love

The Team at Your Natural Way

Inattention or over attention?

2007-08-08T15:01:00.000Z

Any gardeners among you will know that plants need a certain amount of care - they do not need to be watched 24/7, and at the other extreme, if you completely leave them alone they may die, disappear, be swallowed up by weeds or turn into a triffid! There is a lovely sweet spot in the middle where you give them the nurturance they need, the pruning they need to grow as you want them to, and the space and time they need to grow.

Your client garden is the same - constantly heckling someone to become your client is annoying, and leave them alone for 3 years and chances are they will have forgotten about you! Once again, there is a sweet spot - between losing a prospect through over-attention and losing a prospect through inattention, there is the perfect amount of attention to keep them in your garden, growing just as you would like them to.

Are you giving your garden just the right amount of attention?

Love

Donna.x

How Much do You Experiment?

2007-08-07T11:26:00.000Z

"All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better." said Ralph Waldo Emerson. As it applies to all life, it also applies to all business! If what you have is working perfectly, perhaps you have no more need for experimentation. For the vast majority of us, there is still some tweaking to do to get that perfectly working business. How many experiments have you made this week? This month? This year?

Are your experiments bringing you closer to that perfect business? Do you have tried and tested ways of doing what works? Could they be even better? Remember that the nature of experiments is that some of them will not go as you expect - no matter if the result is 'positive' or 'negative' each one is a learning experience and will get you closer to where you want to be...but only if you keep experimenting, changing the factors, evaluating your results.

I once 'experimented' with asking for referrals - with a sample of 3. Funnily enough, the sample wasn't really big enough! When i changed the experiment to a sample of 100, I learned heaps - about my comfort zone in asking for help, about who I wanted referred, about the sort of person who would refer, about the best way to ask for help...and much more. I'm still experimenting with this - and each experiment brings me closer to what works perfectly.

What are you experimenting with today?

Love

Donna.x

Asking the wrong people

2007-08-06T16:41:00.000Z

I've just been chuckling at a forum post in which someone asked a question about what they should do. The first reply told them emphatically to do one thing. The second told them equally emphatically to do exactly the opposite! My post told them to do what felt right for them.

We can always share our experience with others - but there is no right or wrong way in your business...there is just the way that works for you. I have read many many many books on 'how to' grow your business. The one that worked? None of them. What worked was doing it my way - taking some bits from each book (those that I chucked in the bin, I took 'don't do it that way'!) and making my own 'growth plan'.

Other people can help you to find your way...as long as you remember that the one who really knows what works for you is you.

Love

Donna.x

The Magic Mix

2007-08-01T14:12:00.000Z

Do you know everything that you do to get more business? Are you aware of everything that contributes to Your Natural Way to Get Clients? When I say everything, I mean EVERYTHING - including those things you do that are not necessarily business activities. Take exercise for example - I have noticed over the past 3 years that when I am physically active, my mind is clearer and I can work better.

When I am having fun in my 'personal' life, this tips over into my business life because I am more relaxed, laugh more easily and I notice I have some of my best business ideas when I am not at my desk! If you are not already, start to become aware of everything that contributes to Your Natural Way to get clients - just as everyone has their own strengths and ideas, everyone has a unique combination of activities that together are the 'magic mix'.

What is your Magic Mix?

Love

Donna.x

Inspiring Focus

2007-07-31T13:19:00.000Z

Where is your focus for your business? Is your focus on who you want to work with, how many people you want to work with and exactly what you want your business to look like? Or, is your focus on what is wrong, that you don't have enough clients/business, that you hate the early mornings/late nights, that you procrastinate for your country?

Which focus do you think is the most inspiring? Focusing on what you want, or focusing on what's wrong? Which one has you leaping out of bed in the morning, raring to go because your vision is so inspiring? (Hint: if it's focusing on what's wrong, you're doing it the hard way!)

Reconnect to your vision for your business today, and see your enthusiasm soar!

Love

Donna.x

Social business

2007-07-30T16:48:00.000Z

On our latest teleclass, one of our participants found a new way to meet and connect with people - Facebook. This social networking site is good fun, exceedingly random...and a nice way to re-connect with old friends/clients and stay in touch with them in a light and easy way. It's not for everyone - we all have our own Natural Way (and if we were all the same, it would be boring...and crowded!). And there's a good lesson here:

You do what you do all the time - you don't have to put your business 'hat' on to go networking, meeting and connecting. Have some fun, connect, and serve...socially. And watch that approach fill your business.

Love

Donna.x

Riding the Currents of Life

2007-07-27T10:41:00.000Z

It's not as if the currents of life must be studied, examined, charted, explained, plied, or channelled, in order to be effortlessly ridden upon.

Besides, you'd get soaked.

The Universe

Let it be easy. You already know what you need to know, to have it all.

From www.tut.com, a resource we love.

2007-07-25T14:21:00.000Z

"The art of being yourself at your best is the art of unfolding your personality into the person you want to be. . . . Be gentle with yourself, learn to love yourself, to forgive yourself, for only as we have the right attitude toward ourselves can we have the right attitude toward others. "
Wilfred Peterson, This Week (Oct. 1, 1961)

Love

Donna.x

Love That, Hate That

2007-07-23T16:19:00.000Z

Ever have a conversation with someone else in a similar field to you where they tell you how they get more clients and you go 'wow! what a great idea! I'd love to do that', or 'ugh! what a hideous idea! I'd hate to do that.'

Our assumption is that the things you would love to do are aligned with your natural way - like writing is for me. And the things you'd hate to do? Not so aligned with your natural way - like breakfast networking for me (it's not the networking part, it's the getting up at the crack of dawn part!).

Notice what other people can teach you about Your Natural Way. Instead of 'making yourself' do every trick you hear of, do the ones that you will enjoy anyway, the ones that sing to you. If you write a newsletter because you've heard that's what you 'should' do - it's going to be painful every deadline time, and possibly not the best presentation of your genius! Either do what you love, or change the parameters - eg evening networking.

Now that's better!

Love

Donna.x

Y-levels:

2007-07-20T12:31:00.000Z

The Y-level mid-terms (or mocks, if you prefer) are coming up soon. These exams will test your ability to be Yourself. What is your report card going to say? ‘Good on theory, not so hot on the practical’? Or how about ‘has the potential for magnificence, but buries it in layers of perfection, difficulty and trying’? The talk is all about the ease module, and how hard that is. Er…think they’ve missed the point – but you haven’t, right?! Good luck!

Love

Donna.x

Clean Connection

2007-07-18T12:43:00.000Z

What is the difference between connecting with people easily, and connecting in a disconnected way? One answer that often comes up is the expectation from the connection - being attached to the outcome EG this person MUST love me; or this person MUST become a client. It's rarely that obvious, but do a little noticing, and there it is - the expectation that this connection must work out a certain way.

I wonder how this would feel from the other side? Connecting with someone who clearly has expectations of you? Might it feel a little uncomfortable? Might you be a bit concerned about letting them down or getting it wrong? Maybe it's not that obvious, but you still feel 'something' is a bit odd about this connection.

Are your connections clean? Free of expectation and attachment? Easy?

Love

Donna.x

Remember

2007-07-16T16:18:00.000Z

Here at Your Natural Way, we don't just want to teach you something new. We want you to remember what you already know. We want to teach you a new way of being. Being yourself. Even when you are selling. No more putting your pants on outside your trousers, just remembering who you really are and using that authentic self to serve other people by selling them your services.

Sounds much easier than trying to be someone you're not and 'making the numbers' to me, but then I like easy. Do you remember?

Love

Donna.x

Your Duty to Be Yourself

2007-07-12T11:17:00.001Z

By being fully, completely and magnificently yourself, you open the way for thousands of others to do the same. When they see you in all your glory, “getting away with” being you, they get permission to do the same. So, as if doing it for yourself isn’t a good enough reason, you also get to help all those poor souls trying to be something they’re not when you play full out as yourself.

Love

Donna.x

Everyone I meet MUST become a Client

2007-07-11T09:40:00.000Z

Is this how you approach your client getting? Everyone you meet and connect with MUST become a client. Immediately. Or you will never speak to them again? Seriously...take a look at your attitude to your client-getting process. Do you court someone endlessly until they turn you down, then dump them? (Smacks a bit of using someone for sex doesn't it?) Imagine how that must look to the potential client.

Oh, right, if they can't have their wicked way with me, they don't want me?! Right, I am so not going to reccommend this person! What if this potential client doesn't want your product or service today, but in 3 months will put in an the biggest order you've ever had? What if this potential client knows other people (it's quite likely!), and because they know you and like you, they recommend you? What if, even if they never become a client, they somehow will help your business?

What if you let go of your attachment to the idea that everyone you meet must become a client?

Love

Donna.x

I Believe in a Thing Called Work

2007-07-10T09:37:00.000Z

Working hard, putting in the hours, making an effort, pushing the barriers, motivation, strain, stress, worry, pain.

Versus

Ease, joy, fun, play, experimentation, service, passion, love, laughter, movement, sychronicity, inspiration, attraction.

Which do you think a successful business requires?

Which do you think would feel best?

Which would you rather do?

Which do you do?

Love

Donna.x

Looking in the mirror of someone else

2007-07-09T13:14:00.000Z

This weekend, I have been watching the mixed doubles contest from Wimbledon, and thoroughly enjoying the antics of Jelena Jankovic and Jamie Murray. This pairing laughed, jokes and smiled their way through the contest and were an absolute delight to watch. This led me to wondering why I was enjoying them so much, and what they could show me about my natural way.

I loved the joy, the fun, the laughter, the flirtation, the romance (are they, aren't they?), the smiling, the obvious way they were enjoying what they do. When I am fully my natural self, I am joyful, fun, laughing easily and often, flirting, romantic, I smile easily, I clearly enjoy what I do. Aha... A couple of things to add and underline in my personal success formula... What I see and love in them is also in me.

This week, notice what you are enjoying in someone else and what it can tell you about your natural way. Remember, they are a mirror.

Love

Donna.x

Evolving In Service of

2007-07-04T13:19:00.000Z

What we are 'in service of' is an ever-evolving statement. I thought it might be interesting to show how mine has progressed over the past 2 and a half years:

I started with "I am in service of passion and joy" (after discarding about 20 other statements!)

A few months later it became "I am in service of passion and joy in the world"

Then "I am in service of purpose, passion and joy in the world"

Then "I am in service of awakening purpose, passion and joy in the world"

Then "I am in serive of awakening passion, joy and love"

And now "By being fully shining brilliance, I awaken passion, joy and love"

Our understanding of what we're serving changes as we change and grow and develop. Knowing what you serve makes it easier to market your business, to enjoy your life and to be of service! I give mine only as an example, yours will be very personal to you...

If you're wondering whether your statement needs updating, answer me this: does your in service of statement still fill you with the same sense of 'rightness' and give you fuel? If not, it may need to change!

Love

Donna.x
PS If you want to find out more about how to create an 'in service of' statement, go to the website and check out our courses!

Authenticity

2007-07-03T16:36:00.001Z

According to Wikipedia (The biggest multilingual free-content encyclopedia on the Internet), authenticity is a psychological concept in which the individual derives gratification and positive emotions from exercising signature strengths and values.

Seems like a hard way to say, be your natural self (or in a fancy way you could say 'exercising your signature strengths and values'), and while you are at it, no need to apologize, in fact the world will give a standing ovation because you'll be so naturally undeniably attractive :-)
Damn, being your natural way just seems to work!!!!!

Through a Your Natural Way lens

2007-06-19T14:18:00.000Z

The thing about Your Natural Way that I love most is the thing that frightens a lot of people. It's the idea that I know best for me. This appeals to me most because I hate and detest being told what to do...I have done since I was about 2 years old. So the idea that it is up to me is liberating and freeing.

But for some, it is a scary idea...and seems to contain a paradox. How can I know what is best for me if I don't know anything about getting clients? The answer is simple - learn through a Your Natural Way lens - take what you are 'told' is the 'right' way to get clients and put your own spin on it. What resonates for you? What makes sense to you? What makes no sense at all to you?!

Trust that you DO know what's best for you, even if you are yet to learn what it is.

Love

Donna.x